With the infamous online dating app – responsible for millions of hook-ups the world over – already marking its second birthday and set to launch a premium service this month, we thought it timely to enlighten blokes on some tips for successful, tasteful Tindering. The premium service’s paying members will be offered increased match-making power, however, fail to heed the proceeding advice and your pricey swiping efforts may continue to result in a matchless existence.

Photos:
Do: Show off your interests. Unless that interest is biking. Nobody ever looked good in spandex shorts and a helmet. Take advantage of furry friends. It’s low-hanging fruit, but if you own a dog—or have a friend who does—take a picture with it. We can assure you many a woman has swiped right on a guy they were on the fence about because “Aww, he likes animals!” Note: This does not apply to reptiles or rodents.

Don’t: Go overboard trying to be quirky. Remember: nice, normal-looking dude; not one who appears to perpetually habit Halloween costumes or makes crazy hand gestures in every picture. Speaking of dress codes, do not go shirtless! Even if you have a nice body. It’s just one of those things girls like to be pleasantly surprised by in person, like guys who still open doors for girls.

Profile Text:
Do: Keep it simple. A few words is fine, i.e. “Auckland, Med School, Dog Lover.” If you can’t think of anything to say, leave it blank; she’s focusing on your pictures anyway, and it’ll give her plenty to ask about in a conversation. Give some helpful details. An Instagram account or Twitter handle gives her a peek into your life without having to commit to a Facebook request.

Don’t: Quote. What is this? Your Facebook profile? Nor should you use Hallmark dating profile lines. It’s great if you are “just a fun-loving guy looking to meet some new people,” but it doesn’t tell us anything.

Making Contact:
Do: Initiate the conversation. You get to pee standing up, so you have to make the first move. Say something more than “Hi.” It makes you sound like a nervous eleven-year-old girl and gives the recipient nowhere to go.

Don’t: Use emoticons. A recent study found that men who included 🙂 in messages received 66% fewer responses. Nor should you wait too long to ask her out. If you already know where she lives, works, and studied abroad in college, it’s probably time to suggest a drink or coffee. That said, don’t get ahead of yourself either. While “Sunday morning makeout sesh?” is probably any girl’s dream text from a boyfriend, it is not a good opening line from a complete stranger. Don’t call her “sexy”. Or be creepy in general.

General Tips:
Do: Swipe right when you’re on the fence—if nothing else, to see what she thought of you.

Don’t: Spend more than fifteen minutes swiping at a time. Studies have shown overuse of dating apps makes users overly picky. Reality check? You’re likely doing this while eating cereal from the box and watching the Home and Away omnibus. Get off your high horse. Nor should you Tinder on holiday. For some reason, the app seems to get backed up on location-based matches and you’ll only frustrate yourself later.

Our number one tip: Don’t forget to keep your eyes peeled in real life.

Via GQ